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PAST: Awareness in a Longer Historical Perspective

“The most effective way to destroy people is to deny and obliterate their own understanding of their history”. – George Orwell




To understand history, you must grasp how your everyday view of the world developed, how it was created by the reality of the people who lived before you. It took a thousand years to evolve the modern way of looking at things, and to really understand where you are today , you must take yourself back to the 1000 year and then move forward through the entire millennium experientially, as though you actually lived through the whole period yourself in a single lifetime.

The first thing you must understand is that the reality of The Middle Ages, the year one thousand, is being defined by the powerful churchmen of the Christian church. Because of their position, these men hold great influence over the minds of the populace. And the world these churchmen describe as real is, above all, spiritual. They are creating a reality which places their idea about God’s plan for mankind at the very center of life. The churchmen explain that God has placed mankind at the center of his universe, surrounded by the entire cosmos, for one solitary purpose: to win or lose salvation. And in this trial you must correctly choose between two opposing forces: the force of God and the lurking temptations of the Devil. As a mere individual you aren’t qualified to determine your status in this regard. This is the province of the churchmen; they are there to interpret the scriptures and to tell you every step of the way whether you are in accordance with God or whether you are being duped by Satan. If you follow their instructions, you are assured that a rewarding afterlife will follow. But if you fail to heed the course they prescribe, then there is excommunication and certain damnation.

The important thing to understand here is that every aspect of the Medieval world is defined in other-worldly terms. All the phenomena of life – from the chance thunderstorm or earthquake to the succes of crops or death of a loved one – is defined either as the will of God or as the malice of the Devil.

The Medival world view, your world view, begins to fall apart in the fourteenth and fifteenth centuries. First, you notice certain improperties on the part of the churchmen themselves; secretly violating their vows of chasity, for example, or taking gratuities to look the other way when governmental officials violate scriptural laws. These improperties alarm you because these churchmen hold themselves to be the only connection between yourself and God. Remember they are the only interpreters of the scriptures, the sole arbitrators of your salvation. Suddenly you are in the midst of an outright rebellion. A group led by Martin Luther is calling for a complete break from papal Christianity. The churchmen are corrupt, they say, demanding an end to the churchmen’s reign over the minds of the people. New Churches are being formed based on the idea that each person should be able to have acces to the scriptures personally and to  interpret them as they wish, with no middlemen.

As you watch in disbelief, the rebellion succeeds. The churchmen begin to lose. For centuries these men defined reality, and now, before you eyes, they are losing their credibility. Consequently, the whole world is being thrown into question. The clear concensus about the nature of the universe and about humankind’s purpose here, based as it was on the churchmen’s description, is collapsing – leaving you and all the other humans in western culture in a very precarious place. After all you have grown accustomed to having an authority in your life to define reality, and without that external direction you feel confused and lost. If the chruchmen’s descriptions of reality and the reason for human existence is wrong, you ask, then what is right?

Do you see the impact of this collapse on the people of that day? The old world view was being challenged everywhere. In fact, by the 1600s, astronomers had proved beyond a doubt that the sun and stars did not revolve around the Earth as maintained by the church. Clearly the Earth was only a small planet orbitting a minor sun in a galaxy that contained billions of such stars. This is important. Mankind has lost its place at the center of God’s universe. All the things you took for granted now need new definition, especially the nature of God and your relationship to God.

With this awareness the Modern Age begins. There is a growing democratic spirit and a mass distrust of papal and royal authority. Definitions of the universe based on speculation or sciptural faith are no longer automatically accepted. In spite of the loss of certainty, we didn’t want to risk some new group controlling our reality as the churchmen had. If you had been there you would have participated in the creation of a new mandate for science. You would have looked out on this undefined universe and you would have thought, as did the thinkers of that day, that we needed a method of consensus- building, a way to systematically explore this new world of ours. And you would have called this new way of discovering reality the scientific method, which is nothing more than testing an idea about how the universe works, arriving afterward at some conclusion, and then offering this conclusion to others to see if they agree. Then you would have prepared explorers to go out into this new universe , each armed with the scientific method, and you would have given them their historic mission: Explore this place and find out how it works and what it means that we find ourselves alive here.

You knew you had lost your certainty about God-ruled universe and because of that, your certainty about the nature of God himself. But you felt you had a method, a consensus-building process through which you could discover the nature of everything around you, including God , and including the true purpose of mankind’s existence on the planet. So you sent these explorers out to find the true nature of your situation and to report back. At this point we began the preoccupation from which we are awakening now.

What was the preoccupation? Put yourself in that time period. When the scientific method couldn’t bring back a new picture of God and of mankind’s purpose on the planet, the lack of certainty and meaning affected Western culture deeply. We needed something else to do until our questions were answered. Eventually we arrived at what seemed to be a very logical solution. We looked at each other and said: “Well, since our explorers have not yet returned with our true spiritual situation, why not settle into this new world of ours while we are waiting? We are certainly learning enough to manipulate this new world for our own benefit, so why not work in the meantime to raise our standard of living, our sense of security in the world? And that’s what we did. Four centuries ago! We shook off our feeling of being lost by taking matters into our own hands, by focusing on conquering the earth and using its resources to better our situation, and only now, as we approached the end of the millennium and started a new one, can we see what happenend. Our focus gradually became a preoccupation. We totally lost ourselves in creating a secular security, an economical security, to replace the spiritual one we had lost. The question why we were alive, of what was actually going on here spiritually, was slowly pushed aside and repressed altogether. Working to establish a more comfortably style of survival has grown to feel complete in and of itself as a reason to live, and we’ve gradually, methodically, forgotten our original question… We’ve forgotten that we still don’t know what we’re surviving for.

Do you feel as if you have a clearer perspective on the human world? Do you see how preoccupied everyone has been? This perspective explains a lot. How many people do you know who are obsessed with their work, who are type A or have stress related diseases and who can’t slow down because they use their routine to distract themselves, to reduce life to only its practical considerations. And they do this to avoid recalling how uncertain they are about why they live. Observing culture not just from the perspective of our own lifetimes but from the perspective of a whole millenium. It reveals our preoccupation to us and so lifts us above it. You have just experienced this longer history. You now live in a longer now. When you look at the human world now, you should be able to clearly see this obsessiveness, the intense preoccupation with economic progress.

The preoccupation was a necessary  development, a stage in human evolution. Now, however, we’ve spent enough time setteling into the world. It’s time now to wake up from the preoccupation and reconsider our original question. What’s behind life on this planet? Why are we really here?


The Celestine Phrophecy



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“You can only know who you are, by first knowing over and over again, that what you’re not.”

What am I doing here in 2010 my search for meaning took off. Maybe even further back. I remember when I was 5 or 6 years old, I started asking my parents questions about Death. I couldn’t understand how we could spend all our lives growing, working, loving and than one day its all over, dead! Buried in the ground, never to return. How can you just go one with your days without knowing the answer to fundamental questions like whats the point in all of this. The lack of getting satisfying answers to the big questions about life set the stage at an early age, for the rest of  my story.

So now I just turned 30. I had a decent paying Job as an accountmanger. A company car. I married my best friend and love of my life. She owned her own hairsalon. We had an active social life with great friends around. And we bought our first house together. This was the Ideal I had been aiming for since I dropped out of high school. There was no other motivation than having fun and being comfortable while doing it. The perfect picture I held in my Minds Eye was now a reality. I worked 40 hours a week, smoked joints to relax in the evenings and blew off some more steam during the weekends, partying with friends. The cycle repeats itself on mondays and to cope with that we took 2-3 weeks of vacation a year, cause thats the relief you need to keep you going for at least another 30 to 40 years. Nothing to unfamiliar for the average man, pretty standard I would say. Cause thats what we are supposed to do, right? Enjoy the fruits of your hard labour when you reach a respectable age 65/67. Hopefully with some energy left to do what you love fulltime.

I am not the only one, I’m pretty sure, we all thought of what would happen if we didn’t go back to work, after we had the best weekend of our life hanging, drinking and smoking with friends. Or to never returm home after spending 2 weeks at a tropical location, chilling in the sun with your sun tanned partner, being served and eating out all day long. Not to mention fantazising of doing something you exactly love doing all day long and make and living out of it. And what would our lifes look like if we could spend it only surrounded with people we actually love and want to be with. This compared to dragging yourself out of bed, to go through traffic, to a job you hate, to work with people you don’t like, while making money for somebody else. I wasn’t thinking this dark about my career all the time. My life was comfortable enough to be ok with it, but also to throw bigger ambitions out of the window. Smoking my joint the moment I arrived home after work, was all the peace offering I needed. Peace from a society that was as clueless as I was. But the advise was, keep going, keep consuming, as long as you are having fun!

Change arrived in the form of a crises an economical one, which became a personal one. So I was working with an employment agency and in times financial insecurtiy not a lot of businesses are not investing in the workforce. Still the motto at work remained we have to grow. For me as accounmanager that meant, Business got tough. So now a not to motivated sales rep, started to realize that you really had to love your job if you wanted to succeed in times of a crises. I wasn’t up for the challenge. I was working for a company I didn’t admire, with people I didn’t want to be like, doing work I didn’t love. So after many disappointing new business meetings, where nobody was waiting for me, I walked into Klara. Human resource manager with whom I had a business meeting with to see how there company was acting in these challenging times. My goal was to see if there still was a way in which company could be of any service. I believe I had only shook her hand when she looked me in the eyes and said, “You dont want to be here”. “You look unhappy”. Still playing my role, I told her I had a rough day. But she was wright offcourse I wasn’t able to hide it any longer. She told me I could drop the facade and be honest since these were her last days as the Human Resource manager and soon she would be leaving for Africa with her boyfriend. There she was going to help and educate local people on how to built their own farms. She was ready to leave Holland and wanted to do something of importance with her life. “You know what you should do”, she said. “Read Eckhart Tolle’s The New Earth, it speaks about people being lighthouses and showing others the way. And I am telling you now, to go and find yours”.

I listened, I started reading and never stopped. I read The New Earth and Tolle’s other book, The Power of Now.  I continued with The Celestine Phropecy. And so I started researching the internet to learn about the Mayans and the coming of the  ‘end of the world’ in 2012. I went to the darkside of the moon, reading about Conspiracies, Shadow Governments, Illuminati, New World Order, HAARP, Chemtrails, UFOs, Aliens, the coming of Niburu, our Secret History, Giants, the Annunaki, about the secrets of the Pyramids, more Ancient Artifacts and buildings. I came back around continuing the study on Spirituality with books about Buddha, Vipassana, the Tibetan book of Living and Dying, Krishnamurti, Drunvalo Melchizedek and the Flower of Life, a Course in Miracles and much, much more. Eventually I began practicing Meditation and some Yoga. My mind was opening up to different realities and possibilities, in the hope of finding some Peace of Mind in this confusing world we life in.

I went crazy, cause not long after my real talk with Klara I had exactly quit my job and now my fantasy about turning my back on society was going Live. Luckely my strong wife kept me with 2 feet on the ground. So even though I was quite confused on what to do with my life. I was totally lacking direction now, the road to Peace was far from been seen. I managed to produce just enough motivation, to keep looking for new possibilities that might gave me some satisfaction. Actually I just took what I could get, as long as I had not to much responsibilities. For a short time I did Telemarketing again, yes I went there! I worked as a Gardener, how lovely would that be. Working outside all day. It made me start my own vegetable garden with 2 of my best friends. It where 2 great months but we had no matching schedules so the fun of doing it together slipped away. Aswell working outside, doing all the heavy work in the burning sun. Colleagues with broken backs and knees, not for me. Then I started as a bike mechanic, cause through friends I picked up on a diy hobby. Stripping down old race bikes and turning them in to naked fixed gear bikes (no gears, no brakes). The ultimate kick was riding these death machines as fast as we could through town. An Rush of blood to the head, adrenaline makes you feel alive. With this came a plan. The mechanic job really was a tactical move to learn a new skill. By now I understood working for somebody you don’t want to be like wasn’t the answer. I wanted to inspire myself.  The whole search for happiness had started with the assignment to find my own. So in my understanding that had to mean, starting my own business.

A Legacy was born. While still working for the Bike shop, I now had myself a nice side hustle, selling my own custom racebikes to hipsters looking for the latest trend. The options on how to personalize your unique minimalistic ride grew and from there  I landed my first big assignment for a fashion brand. Skip one year, I was running shop in my wifes hairsalon in Amsterdam. They had an used basement which they wanted to turn in a concept store, so like that I became part of the Bubblekid Family. Its was a great new experience for me.

A place of inspiration, thats what my wife and her business partner had created with Bubblekid hairsalon. We had an work force of 8 totally different personalities united by the philosophy ” In creation we Trust”. In this place friendships were born and personalities shaped. Its was a welcoming place to all and we challenged our selves to make the world a better place. Amazing right?, a Hairsalon with a bigger vision than just cutting hairs and talking about the weather. This was a Space where people of all walks of live just came to relax, have a conversation or meet with friends. Imagine sitting around one long table with no mirrors, cheeky music playing through the speakers, a vibrant level of realness and connection with customers & eachother, I had never experienced in corporate world. How gratefull I was to be part of this.






Thank you.





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