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We don’t do Why

We are trained in the How, What, Where, When.

But without the Why, How do we know we are on the right side of things?


Why have most people accepted the work-eat-entertainment-sleep cycle as life?  (longer now- Redfield)

Why have most people no desire for a deeper understanding of our purpose in this universe? (human condition -Griffith)

Why are we not able to change? (breaking the habit of being yourself – Dispenza)

Why we Love? (our longing back to oneness)



PRESENT: The Human Condition “We conquered the past, the future is here at last”

Adam & Eve without the guilt: explaining our battle between instinct and intellect

Australian biologist Jeremy Griffith offers a new biological understanding to the human condition – linking ‘good’ and ‘evil’ to our evolved consciousness, not our animal past


Jeremy Griffith: it makes sense that when our species became fully conscious a psychologically upsetting battle would have broken out between our already established instinctive self and newer, self-managing conscious mind

When the psychologist Maureen O’Hara observed that humanity is either standing on the brink of “a quantum leap in human psychological capabilities or heading for a global nervous breakdown”, she was recognising the end play state the human race is now in where we have to find the reconciling, psychologically healing understanding of our “good” vs “evil” riven human condition – or perish in a horrible agony of terminal psychosis. In Bono’s words from one of U2’s songs, to save ourselves we have to “kick the darkness” of the mystery of the human condition “til it bleeds [the] daylight” of understanding of it.

Bob Geldof accurately pleaded our species’ plight when, in his aptly titled album Deep in the Heart of Nowhere, he sang, “What are we going to do because it can’t go on…This is the world calling. God help us”, and “Searching through their sacred books for the holy grail of ‘why’, but the total sum of knowledge knows no more than you or I.”

Yes, “why” are we humans the way we are, competitive, aggressive and selfish when the ideals of life are so obviously to be co-operative, loving and selfless? To prevent O’Hara’s “global nervous breakdown” from occurring, we need the answer to that riddle of riddles; as Harvard biologist EO Wilson recently wrote, “There is no grail more elusive or precious in the life of the mind than the key to understanding the human condition.”

Certainly we have excused the darker aspects of our nature as relics of a competitive and aggressive animal past where the instinct to survive and reproduce genes dictated behaviour. But isn’t this reason, which biologists, including EO Wilson, have been perpetuating, just a convenient excuse we used while we searched for the real cause of our divisive nature? After all, words used to describe human behaviour such as egocentric, deluded, inspired, depressed, pessimistic, optimistic, hateful, guilt-ridden, evil, immoral, neurotic, psychotic, or alienated, all recognise the involvement of our species’ fully conscious thinking mind. They reveal there is a psychological dimension to our behaviour; that we don’t suffer from a genetic-opportunism-driven “animal condition”, but the psychologically troubled human condition O’Hara referred to.

To visualise what happened, imagine what would occur if we placed a fully conscious brain on a stork migrating from Africa to Europe to breed. Now conscious, this stork (who we’ll call Adam) starts thinking for himself, and seeing some apple trees on an island decides to depart from his instinctive flight path to visit the island for a feed. He carries out his first experiment in self-management.

The problem is Adam’s instincts naturally try to pull him back onto the flight path; they, in effect, oppose and condemn his search for knowledge. But if Adam is to master his fully conscious mind he has to continue his experiments in self-adjustment.

What can Adam do?

Ideally he would explain to his instincts why he is having to defy them. He would explain the difference between the gene-based and nerve-based learning systems – that while instincts, which are acquired over many thousands of generations of natural selection, can give species orientations, the nerve-based conscious mind, which is able to understand the relationship between cause and effect (*), needs understandings to operate.

(*) NOTE: New Understanding of the world through Quantum physics,

Cause and effect vs Causing an effect;

The dualistic Cartesian/Newtoninan model is flawed. When the external environment is controlling your internal environment (thinking/feeling). Thats Cause and Effect.

Instead change you internal environment- The way you think and feel – and then see how the external environment is altered by your efforts. Strive to create an unknown, new future experience. You are a Quantum Creator.

The problem is Adam is just setting out on his search for knowledge and has no ability to explain anything. So three things unavoidably happen: Adam defensively retaliates against the unjust criticism, he tries to block it out of his mind, and he desperately seeks any reinforcement he can find to relieve himself of the negative feelings. Since the definition of “ego” is “conscious thinking self”, Adam becomes ego-centric; his conscious mind becomes centred on trying to validate itself through achieving as much compensatory power, fame, fortune and glory as he can. He unavoidably becomes a psychologically upset sufferer of anger, alienation and egocentricity, which are all the aspects of the human condition that we fully conscious humans experience.

The story is similar to the pre-scientific Biblical account of Adam and Eve taking the fruit from “the tree of knowledge” (meaning, they became conscious and began to seek knowledge), but this account has a completely different outcome. While Adam and Eve were “banished” from the Garden of Eden for having become “sinful” selfish, competitive and aggressive villains, this story explains that Adam and Eve, we humans, are actually the heroes of the story of life on Earth! This is because the conscious mind must surely be nature’s greatest invention, and since we were the species given the upsetting task of championing the intellect over the ignorant, unjust condemnation of instincts, we have to be the heroes of the story of life on Earth.

We humans had no choice but to persevere with our search for knowledge and suffer the psychologically upset state of being angry, alienated and egocentric until we could develop the scientific method and through that vehicle for enquiry find the redeeming explanation for our upset condition of the difference between the gene- and nerve-based learning systems – the key insight that reveals we humans are good and not bad after all. The “sacred” scriptures that Geldof referred to couldn’t answer the “why” of our divided human condition (**) until science clarified the difference between the gene- and nerve-based learning systems.

(**) NOTE: Conscious and subconscious Mind;

Our consciousness mind got hijacked or experienced an inmense trauma (PAST: Awareness in a Longer Historic Perspective) by which it accepted one wrong thought. This thought repeated collectively got burried deep in our subconscious mind (the bodies nervous system, our temple) and there it formed our false beliefs about our selves and the world at large. The thought of ‘Separation’.

After all, words used to describe human behaviour such as egocentric, deluded, inspired, depressed, pessimistic, optimistic, hateful, guilt-ridden, evil, immoral, neurotic, psychotic, or alienated, all recognise the involvement of our species’ dualistic subconscious thinking mind.

The Future is only 1 thought away, Remember (become conscious again) your Original Expression which is Unity, co-operative, loving and selfless. Free your mind of its preoccupation, trying to validate itself through achieving as much compensatory power, fame, fortune and glory as he can.

And most wonderful of all, through this clarifying insight all our psychologically defensive angry, alienated and egocentric behaviour is made redundant. With the great burden of guilt lifted from the human race, the old insecure, upset life that went with it is finally over. As Bono anticipated when he wrote and sang, everyone will now be able “to feel sunlight [of liberating understanding] on my face, see that dust cloud [of all our upset behaviour] disappear without a trace”. We will be able “to take shelter from the poison rain…high on a desert plain [in a wonderful ego-less new world] where the streets have no name”; a place where “there will be no toil or sorrow…no time of pain”, and everyone will sing “I’ve conquered my past, the future is here at last. I stand at the entrance to a new world I can see. The ruins to the right of me, will soon have lost sight of me. Love [in its purest form, which is truth, has] rescue[D] me.”

Jeremy Griffith’s Freedom: The End Of The Human Condition is published by WTM

To learn more about Jeremy Griffith’s work and recieve free downloads visit the website:

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Man Awakening

We moved to Ibiza, which meant a new environment with many new challenges. We had our son nine months after we made the move. We were kinda isolated with no friends or family around for support and zero distractions. Life had me cornered and I came with zero preparation to stand a chance. You could say it was a perfect starting point for shit to go down!

After a while of adjusting to our new lives we decided that I took on the task of a stay at home dad. My wife continued her work as a hairdresser and inmediatley started making good money. For me this was a problem I still felt overwelmed with all the changes taking place and I had no idea what to do professionaly. So it was best for me to take some time to think about what I wanted, while taking care of our new born son and all of the home chores.


The truth was I was slowly slipping into a survival mode, becoming frustrated and thinking of ways to go back to Holland.  I really wanted to take care of our son and be an amazing Father and Housewife, but at the same time I felt worried I wasn’t providing for our family like a man was supposed to do. And confused on how to fix this.

I found myself trapped between; an outdated conditioning, feeling emotionaly guilty and ashamed, while going in circles overthinking my situation, desperatley wanting to find a way to get me out of this suffering. I call myself lucky, with a patient loving wife who supported me. And my loyal friend for years, that made me forget all of my problems for a while, WEED. I was able to get out of bed every morning, grinding through the day, cause I didn’t allow my feelings to get the best of me. Just cover them in a thick cloud of smoke and act like everything is alright, while inside I was crying feeling small and  incompetent to deal with the situation.

BUT LIFE HAS ITS WAYS TO FIND US, which makes you question the mystery that underlies human life. The right moment came and it was unexpected, a coincedental experience.

I hadn’t seen my brother in almost 2 years, after 10 days of staying with us on Ibiza he went back to his own life. It was like any other situation, in which people visit for a vacation and leave to return home. But this time I felt like, a part of me was leaving and I missed it the moment he drove off. That night, weeks after my wife payed to get acces to one of Dr. Joe Dispenzas live Streams, I watched his 3 hour lecture on heart and brain coherence.  And thats when it klicked. I can’t say exactly what part did the trick, but somehow I now understood how I never really felt through certain emotions before. And that my smoking habit was unconsciously keeping me from connecting with my environment and other people on a higher level. It was right there and than I decided I was done with it. I became conscious of what I was looking for, a more fulfilling experience of life. And now armed with the given wisdom and the knowledge of how to apply it, a true man started to Awaken.

to be continued…





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FUTURE: The New Human Culture

“I honestly belief human beings are not meant to live like this. We are meant to live in loving communities and be around nature every day and grow our own food and create and not work day and night until we die. This longing for another life is not human nature, it’s a symptom of modern society”.


Human culture will change as a result of conscious evolution. We humans will voluntarily decrease our population so that we all may live in the most powerful and beautiful places on earth. We will intentionally let the forests go uncut so that they can mature and build energy.

Humans will typically live among five hundred year old trees and carefully tended gardens, yet within easy travel distance of an urban area of incredible technological wizardry. By then the means of survival – foodstuffs and clothing and transportation – will all be totally automated and at everyone’s disposal. Our needs will be completely met without the exchange of any currency, yet also without any overindulgence or laziness. Guided by their intuitions, everyone will know precisely what to do and when to do it, and this will fit harmoniously with the actions of others. No one will consume excessively because we will have let go of the need to possess and to control for security. Life will have become about something else.

Our sense of purpose will be satisfied by the thrill of our own evolution – by the elation of receiving intuitions and then watching closely as our destinies unfold. Everyone has slowed down and become more alert, ever vigilant for the next meaningful encounter that comes along. We will know it could occur anywhere: on a path that winds through a forest, for instance or on a bridge that traverse some canyon. Can you visualize human encounters that have this much meaning and significance? Think how it would be for two people meeting for the first time. Each will first observe the other’s energy field, exposing any manipulation. Once clear, they consciously share life stories until, elatedly, messages are discovered. Afterward, each will go forward again on their individual journey, but they will be significantly altered. They will vibrate at a new level and will thereafter touch others in a way not possible before their meeting. Our Natural pursuit of the truth will lead us there. But to grasp how this movement will occur, it is necassary to visualize it as though you were living through it in one lifetime!

Think about what has occurred already in this millennium. During the Middle Ages we lived in a simple world of good and evil, defined by the churchmen. But during the Renaissance we broke free. We knew there had to be more to man’s situation in  the universe than the churchmen knew, and we wanted the full story. We then sent science out to discover our true situation, but when this effort didn’t provide the answerd we needed right away, we decided to settle in, and turned our modern work ethic into preoccupation that seculaerized reality and squeezed the mystery out of the world. But now, we can see the truth of that preoccupation. We can see that the real reason we spent five centuries creating material supports for human life was to set the stage for something else, a way of life that returns the mystery to existence.

That is what the information now returning from the scientific method indicates: mankind is on this planet to consciously evolve. And as we learn to evolve and pursue our particular path, truth by truth, the overall culture will transform in a very predictable way. Once we reach the critical mass and the insights begin to come in on a global scal, the human race will first experience a period of intense introspection. We’ll grasp how beautiful and spiritual the natural world really is. We’ll see trees and rivers and mountains as temples of great power to be held in reverence and awe. We’ll demand an end to any economic activity that threatens this treasure. And those closest to this situation will find alternative solutions to this pollution problem because someone will intuit these alternatives as they seek their own evolution. This will be part of the first great shift that will occur. Which will be a dramtic movement of individuals from one occupation to another, because when people begin to recieve clear intuitions of who they really are and what they’re supposed to be doing, they very often discover they’re in the wrong job and they have to jump to another type of work in order to continue to grow.

The next cultural shift will be an automation of the production of goods. To the people who are doing the automating, the technicians, this will feel like a need to make the ecoomy run more efficiently. But as their intuitions become clearer, they willl see that what automation is actually doing is freeing up everyone’s time, so that we can pursue other endeavours. The rest of us, meanwhile, will be following our own intuitions within our chosen occupations and whising we had even more free time. we will realize that the truth we have to tell and the things we have to do are too unique to fit within a usual job setting. So we will find ways to cut our employment hours to pursue our own truth. Two or three people will hold what used to be one full-time job. this trend will make it easier for those displaced by the automation to find at least part-time jobs.

Our income will remain stable because of the people, who are giving us money for the insights we provide. As we discover more about energy dynamics of the universe, we will see what really happens when we give someone something. Giving is a universal principle of support. When we give, we recieve in return because of the way energy interacts in the universe. Once we begin to give constantly, we will always have more coming in than we could possibly give away. And our gifts should go to the person who have given us spiritual truth. When people come into our lives at just the right time to give us the answer we need, we should give them money. This is how we will begin to supplement our incomes and ease out of the occupations which limit us. As more people engage in this spiritual economy we will begin a real shift into the culture of the next millennium. We will have moved through the stage of evolving into our right occupation and will be entering the stage of getting paid for evolving freely and offering our unique truth to others. The situation would free us up to expand what is already the information age.

But the important thing for us right now is that we can now understand where we are going. We could not save the environment and democratize the planet and feed the poor before because for so long we could not release our fear of scarcity and our need to control, so that we could give to others. We couldn’t release it because we had no view of life that served as an alternative. Now we do! The most important thing is that we see the truth of this way of life. We’re here on this planet not to build personal empires of control, but to evolve. Paying others for their insight will begin the transformation and then as more and more parts of the economy are automated, currency will disappear altogether. We won’t need it. If we are correctly following our intuitive guidance then we will take only what we need. And we’ll understand that the natural areas of the erath have to be nurtured and protected for the sources of incredible power that they are. As the human rece evolves spiritually, we will voluntarily decrease the population to a point sustainable for the earth. We will be committed to living within the natural energy systems of the planet. The earth’s trees will grow and age and finally mature into powerful forests. Eventually, these forests will be the rule rather than the exception, and all human beings will live in close proximity to this kind of power.

Think what an energy filled world we will live in. This will raise everyone’s energy level. It would accelerate the pace of our evolution. The more readily we have energy flowing into us, the mysteriously the universe responds by bringing people into our lives to asnwer our questions. And every time we follow an intuition and some mysterious encounter leads us forward, our personal vinration increases. Onward and upward. We’ll continue to achieve higher and higher levels of energy and vibration. The transformation of the planet would create a totally spiritual culture and would raise human beings to higher and higher vibrations, this rise would lead to the occurrence of a crossover, to expand the physical world into the spiritual.

The Celestine Prophecy


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#10yearchallenge, evolution

“Humans will change as a result of conscious evolution” James Redfield – Celestine Phrophecy




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PAST: Awareness in a Longer Historical Perspective

“The most effective way to destroy people is to deny and obliterate their own understanding of their history”. – George Orwell




To understand history, you must grasp how your everyday view of the world developed, how it was created by the reality of the people who lived before you. It took a thousand years to evolve the modern way of looking at things, and to really understand where you are today , you must take yourself back to the 1000 year and then move forward through the entire millennium experientially, as though you actually lived through the whole period yourself in a single lifetime.

The first thing you must understand is that the reality of The Middle Ages, the year one thousand, is being defined by the powerful churchmen of the Christian church. Because of their position, these men hold great influence over the minds of the populace. And the world these churchmen describe as real is, above all, spiritual. They are creating a reality which places their idea about God’s plan for mankind at the very center of life. The churchmen explain that God has placed mankind at the center of his universe, surrounded by the entire cosmos, for one solitary purpose: to win or lose salvation. And in this trial you must correctly choose between two opposing forces: the force of God and the lurking temptations of the Devil. As a mere individual you aren’t qualified to determine your status in this regard. This is the province of the churchmen; they are there to interpret the scriptures and to tell you every step of the way whether you are in accordance with God or whether you are being duped by Satan. If you follow their instructions, you are assured that a rewarding afterlife will follow. But if you fail to heed the course they prescribe, then there is excommunication and certain damnation.

The important thing to understand here is that every aspect of the Medieval world is defined in other-worldly terms. All the phenomena of life – from the chance thunderstorm or earthquake to the succes of crops or death of a loved one – is defined either as the will of God or as the malice of the Devil.

The Medival world view, your world view, begins to fall apart in the fourteenth and fifteenth centuries. First, you notice certain improperties on the part of the churchmen themselves; secretly violating their vows of chasity, for example, or taking gratuities to look the other way when governmental officials violate scriptural laws. These improperties alarm you because these churchmen hold themselves to be the only connection between yourself and God. Remember they are the only interpreters of the scriptures, the sole arbitrators of your salvation. Suddenly you are in the midst of an outright rebellion. A group led by Martin Luther is calling for a complete break from papal Christianity. The churchmen are corrupt, they say, demanding an end to the churchmen’s reign over the minds of the people. New Churches are being formed based on the idea that each person should be able to have acces to the scriptures personally and to  interpret them as they wish, with no middlemen.

As you watch in disbelief, the rebellion succeeds. The churchmen begin to lose. For centuries these men defined reality, and now, before you eyes, they are losing their credibility. Consequently, the whole world is being thrown into question. The clear concensus about the nature of the universe and about humankind’s purpose here, based as it was on the churchmen’s description, is collapsing – leaving you and all the other humans in western culture in a very precarious place. After all you have grown accustomed to having an authority in your life to define reality, and without that external direction you feel confused and lost. If the chruchmen’s descriptions of reality and the reason for human existence is wrong, you ask, then what is right?

Do you see the impact of this collapse on the people of that day? The old world view was being challenged everywhere. In fact, by the 1600s, astronomers had proved beyond a doubt that the sun and stars did not revolve around the Earth as maintained by the church. Clearly the Earth was only a small planet orbitting a minor sun in a galaxy that contained billions of such stars. This is important. Mankind has lost its place at the center of God’s universe. All the things you took for granted now need new definition, especially the nature of God and your relationship to God.

With this awareness the Modern Age begins. There is a growing democratic spirit and a mass distrust of papal and royal authority. Definitions of the universe based on speculation or sciptural faith are no longer automatically accepted. In spite of the loss of certainty, we didn’t want to risk some new group controlling our reality as the churchmen had. If you had been there you would have participated in the creation of a new mandate for science. You would have looked out on this undefined universe and you would have thought, as did the thinkers of that day, that we needed a method of consensus- building, a way to systematically explore this new world of ours. And you would have called this new way of discovering reality the scientific method, which is nothing more than testing an idea about how the universe works, arriving afterward at some conclusion, and then offering this conclusion to others to see if they agree. Then you would have prepared explorers to go out into this new universe , each armed with the scientific method, and you would have given them their historic mission: Explore this place and find out how it works and what it means that we find ourselves alive here.

You knew you had lost your certainty about God-ruled universe and because of that, your certainty about the nature of God himself. But you felt you had a method, a consensus-building process through which you could discover the nature of everything around you, including God , and including the true purpose of mankind’s existence on the planet. So you sent these explorers out to find the true nature of your situation and to report back. At this point we began the preoccupation from which we are awakening now.

What was the preoccupation? Put yourself in that time period. When the scientific method couldn’t bring back a new picture of God and of mankind’s purpose on the planet, the lack of certainty and meaning affected Western culture deeply. We needed something else to do until our questions were answered. Eventually we arrived at what seemed to be a very logical solution. We looked at each other and said: “Well, since our explorers have not yet returned with our true spiritual situation, why not settle into this new world of ours while we are waiting? We are certainly learning enough to manipulate this new world for our own benefit, so why not work in the meantime to raise our standard of living, our sense of security in the world? And that’s what we did. Four centuries ago! We shook off our feeling of being lost by taking matters into our own hands, by focusing on conquering the earth and using its resources to better our situation, and only now, as we approached the end of the millennium and started a new one, can we see what happenend. Our focus gradually became a preoccupation. We totally lost ourselves in creating a secular security, an economical security, to replace the spiritual one we had lost. The question why we were alive, of what was actually going on here spiritually, was slowly pushed aside and repressed altogether. Working to establish a more comfortably style of survival has grown to feel complete in and of itself as a reason to live, and we’ve gradually, methodically, forgotten our original question… We’ve forgotten that we still don’t know what we’re surviving for.

Do you feel as if you have a clearer perspective on the human world? Do you see how preoccupied everyone has been? This perspective explains a lot. How many people do you know who are obsessed with their work, who are type A or have stress related diseases and who can’t slow down because they use their routine to distract themselves, to reduce life to only its practical considerations. And they do this to avoid recalling how uncertain they are about why they live. Observing culture not just from the perspective of our own lifetimes but from the perspective of a whole millenium. It reveals our preoccupation to us and so lifts us above it. You have just experienced this longer history. You now live in a longer now. When you look at the human world now, you should be able to clearly see this obsessiveness, the intense preoccupation with economic progress.

The preoccupation was a necessary  development, a stage in human evolution. Now, however, we’ve spent enough time setteling into the world. It’s time now to wake up from the preoccupation and reconsider our original question. What’s behind life on this planet? Why are we really here?


The Celestine Phrophecy



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“You can only know who you are, by first knowing over and over again, that what you’re not.”

What am I doing here in 2010 my search for meaning took off. Maybe even further back. I remember when I was 5 or 6 years old, I started asking my parents questions about Death. I couldn’t understand how we could spend all our lives growing, working, loving and than one day its all over, dead! Buried in the ground, never to return. How can you just go one with your days without knowing the answer to fundamental questions like whats the point in all of this. The lack of getting satisfying answers to the big questions about life set the stage at an early age, for the rest of  my story.

So now I just turned 30. I had a decent paying Job as an accountmanger. A company car. I married my best friend and love of my life. She owned her own hairsalon. We had an active social life with great friends around. And we bought our first house together. This was the Ideal I had been aiming for since I dropped out of high school. There was no other motivation than having fun and being comfortable while doing it. The perfect picture I held in my Minds Eye was now a reality. I worked 40 hours a week, smoked joints to relax in the evenings and blew off some more steam during the weekends, partying with friends. The cycle repeats itself on mondays and to cope with that we took 2-3 weeks of vacation a year, cause thats the relief you need to keep you going for at least another 30 to 40 years. Nothing to unfamiliar for the average man, pretty standard I would say. Cause thats what we are supposed to do, right? Enjoy the fruits of your hard labour when you reach a respectable age 65/67. Hopefully with some energy left to do what you love fulltime.

I am not the only one, I’m pretty sure, we all thought of what would happen if we didn’t go back to work, after we had the best weekend of our life hanging, drinking and smoking with friends. Or to never returm home after spending 2 weeks at a tropical location, chilling in the sun with your sun tanned partner, being served and eating out all day long. Not to mention fantazising of doing something you exactly love doing all day long and make and living out of it. And what would our lifes look like if we could spend it only surrounded with people we actually love and want to be with. This compared to dragging yourself out of bed, to go through traffic, to a job you hate, to work with people you don’t like, while making money for somebody else. I wasn’t thinking this dark about my career all the time. My life was comfortable enough to be ok with it, but also to throw bigger ambitions out of the window. Smoking my joint the moment I arrived home after work, was all the peace offering I needed. Peace from a society that was as clueless as I was. But the advise was, keep going, keep consuming, as long as you are having fun!

Change arrived in the form of a crises an economical one, which became a personal one. So I was working with an employment agency and in times financial insecurtiy not a lot of businesses are not investing in the workforce. Still the motto at work remained we have to grow. For me as accounmanager that meant, Business got tough. So now a not to motivated sales rep, started to realize that you really had to love your job if you wanted to succeed in times of a crises. I wasn’t up for the challenge. I was working for a company I didn’t admire, with people I didn’t want to be like, doing work I didn’t love. So after many disappointing new business meetings, where nobody was waiting for me, I walked into Klara. Human resource manager with whom I had a business meeting with to see how there company was acting in these challenging times. My goal was to see if there still was a way in which company could be of any service. I believe I had only shook her hand when she looked me in the eyes and said, “You dont want to be here”. “You look unhappy”. Still playing my role, I told her I had a rough day. But she was wright offcourse I wasn’t able to hide it any longer. She told me I could drop the facade and be honest since these were her last days as the Human Resource manager and soon she would be leaving for Africa with her boyfriend. There she was going to help and educate local people on how to built their own farms. She was ready to leave Holland and wanted to do something of importance with her life. “You know what you should do”, she said. “Read Eckhart Tolle’s The New Earth, it speaks about people being lighthouses and showing others the way. And I am telling you now, to go and find yours”.

I listened, I started reading and never stopped. I read The New Earth and Tolle’s other book, The Power of Now.  I continued with The Celestine Phropecy. And so I started researching the internet to learn about the Mayans and the coming of the  ‘end of the world’ in 2012. I went to the darkside of the moon, reading about Conspiracies, Shadow Governments, Illuminati, New World Order, HAARP, Chemtrails, UFOs, Aliens, the coming of Niburu, our Secret History, Giants, the Annunaki, about the secrets of the Pyramids, more Ancient Artifacts and buildings. I came back around continuing the study on Spirituality with books about Buddha, Vipassana, the Tibetan book of Living and Dying, Krishnamurti, Drunvalo Melchizedek and the Flower of Life, a Course in Miracles and much, much more. Eventually I began practicing Meditation and some Yoga. My mind was opening up to different realities and possibilities, in the hope of finding some Peace of Mind in this confusing world we life in.

I went crazy, cause not long after my real talk with Klara I had exactly quit my job and now my fantasy about turning my back on society was going Live. Luckely my strong wife kept me with 2 feet on the ground. So even though I was quite confused on what to do with my life. I was totally lacking direction now, the road to Peace was far from been seen. I managed to produce just enough motivation, to keep looking for new possibilities that might gave me some satisfaction. Actually I just took what I could get, as long as I had not to much responsibilities. For a short time I did Telemarketing again, yes I went there! I worked as a Gardener, how lovely would that be. Working outside all day. It made me start my own vegetable garden with 2 of my best friends. It where 2 great months but we had no matching schedules so the fun of doing it together slipped away. Aswell working outside, doing all the heavy work in the burning sun. Colleagues with broken backs and knees, not for me. Then I started as a bike mechanic, cause through friends I picked up on a diy hobby. Stripping down old race bikes and turning them in to naked fixed gear bikes (no gears, no brakes). The ultimate kick was riding these death machines as fast as we could through town. An Rush of blood to the head, adrenaline makes you feel alive. With this came a plan. The mechanic job really was a tactical move to learn a new skill. By now I understood working for somebody you don’t want to be like wasn’t the answer. I wanted to inspire myself.  The whole search for happiness had started with the assignment to find my own. So in my understanding that had to mean, starting my own business.

A Legacy was born. While still working for the Bike shop, I now had myself a nice side hustle, selling my own custom racebikes to hipsters looking for the latest trend. The options on how to personalize your unique minimalistic ride grew and from there  I landed my first big assignment for a fashion brand. Skip one year, I was running shop in my wifes hairsalon in Amsterdam. They had an used basement which they wanted to turn in a concept store, so like that I became part of the Bubblekid Family. Its was a great new experience for me.

A place of inspiration, thats what my wife and her business partner had created with Bubblekid hairsalon. We had an work force of 8 totally different personalities united by the philosophy ” In creation we Trust”. In this place friendships were born and personalities shaped. Its was a welcoming place to all and we challenged our selves to make the world a better place. Amazing right?, a Hairsalon with a bigger vision than just cutting hairs and talking about the weather. This was a Space where people of all walks of live just came to relax, have a conversation or meet with friends. Imagine sitting around one long table with no mirrors, cheeky music playing through the speakers, a vibrant level of realness and connection with customers & eachother, I had never experienced in corporate world. How gratefull I was to be part of this.






Thank you.



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Be who you needed when you were younger

Don’t mistaken my previous post as a judgement, when clearly it’s a statement. “Be who you needed when you were Younger” It’s about personal transformation and challenging you to do the same.

I was living an average life too. On the outside it might have looked like something adventurous. But on the inside I was trapped between walls of frustration, confusion and insecurity. My state of being was keeping me small and my body weak. Physicaly comfortable sedated in a green cloud, while my mind was going in circles only seeing what it knows. It was only when I started feeling again, things became clear on what I was missing. A space opened up for new understanding to enter.

Unconsciously I had withdrawn myself from the outside world, with every Joint I smoked. Keeping me from making genuine connections with a new environment. Connections I secretly graved for. But buried deep by an unconscious conditioning.
I believe the many seeds I had planted in my mind over the past 10 years, with the intent to change. Finally caught daylight and first contact was made.


Acknowledging my feelings was the key to opening my heart. Honesty. I felt like I was failing the people I loved. So intention put in action meant admitting it to them. I wanted to change. And that right there, hinged the whole door off. What exactly had opened my heart? Self Love.

Self love is more than basking in your light. Self love is identifying where you fucking up, being accountable for it and correcting it.

I continue the work, taking one step at a time. A daily practice of “intentionally guiding my life” towards my highest desire.

Living in creation.





Are you comfortable, yeah You!
You know you live an Average Life, right?
And I see, deep down it pisses you off!
So Stop being Fucking Average. Before you are to late.

We need you to ADMIT to some shit, be honest at least with yourself.
If you ever really want to heal, change or get what you truly desire…
ADMIT that ‘they’ broke you, made you weak, and took your self worth from you.
ADMIT that YOU allowed it all to happen because from the beginning, you never really loved yourself enough to realize they weren’t good for you.
ADMIT that you’re better off moving on and understanding it was all a lesson to make you better, stronger person…
Because staying where you are is keeping you from becoming who You are MEANT TO BE.

Being whole and unique is your Birthright!
Nobody told you this before, but You must know it is the Truth.
You are the one you have been waiting for.
It was always only You.
Answer the call!
I hope to hear from You soon.